The days between my posts seem to grow longer and longer. It is not because I have nothing to report. It is because I have nothing sane to report. The world has gone mad and I have decided to jump in with both feet and join the insanity. So what has been keeping me so busy.

As one can imagine, Halloween sucked up a lot of my attention recently. I was in my kitchen making goodies for a Halloween party. I baked a spider cake, a dozen German mummy cupcakes, a couple dozen monster fingers, and many gingersnaps (which I am told contained crack). I also made some delectable werewolf chow. Then I rustled up some decorations and shoved those into my car as well.

Halloween dawned with a frazzled Bella slipping into her bathroom to begin getting ready to slip into something more sexy. I decided to wear the Hathor costume again, receiving such input as a snide, "Oh, you're wearing that again", an appreciative, "That's a pretty pimping costume, btw", and some advice to go out to bars and pick up guys. I decided to just visit with some friends and then go to the party at the church (which I became officially in charge of, as is normally the case).

Things started off pretty well. I managed to lock my keys and my cell phone in the Institute building. This resulted in me making some new friends at the Dairy Mart who allowed me to borrow their phone. Sister Waldron and her two young charges came to my rescue. After letting me in the building, they also helped me decorate, ice mummy cupcakes, and set out treats for all to enjoy.

This was appreciated by the pregnant nun, pimp priest, bishop, chemistry student, Eclipse driver, and missionaries who showed up for the party. It was also appreciated briefly by my third wife and her boyfriend who showed up to party with us. When her boyfriend and I were fighting over her, however, my costume decided to join the battle resulting in pain to her sweater. In short, I think the costume won the battle. I have spent most of the rest of the weekend eating the leftovers. I may actually be sugar by this point.

I also helped a couple of friends move a few possessions to the townhouse next door. Now I shall be found standing between the two doors, deciding which one to knock on first. I've been in and out of both places so much lately that I am pretty sure all the neighbors think I live there.

My staunch Republican friends are all up at arms in the wake of the election results. I am still pretending I care one way or the other about how things are going. You'd think we just declared someone our God or king instead of giving them the right to run our country. We live in a democracy people. Our government is supposed to work for us, but we can't sit idly by and blame our president for what is going on. For instance, our current financial crisis is really our fault. Every one of us who buys things on credit and lives from paycheck to paycheck. Yeah, we're at fault. I am not talking about buying a home or a car as those are necessary evils (assuming we don't buy that Corvette instead of that Cavalier). I am referring to that brand name dress that we are only going to wear once or that top of the line make-up that costs more than I spend on clothes in a year.

I am tired of listening to people (myself included) whine about things that it is in their power to change. You don't like your job? Look for a new one. Get more education if you can't find one that suits you. You don't like your friends? Find new ones. It is going to hurt and feel like a betrayal, but if your friends are putting you down, well, sugar, they really aren't your friends. You don't like what is on television? Stop watching it. Read a book. Take a walk. Dance with your cat. You don't like the deterioration of your neighborhood? Fix up your own house. Keeping up with the Joneses can do wonders for an area.

It's been a rough week for me in the worrying- about- what- isn't- really- my- business department. As always, this leads me to contemplate the slippery slope we are sliding on. I am tired of watching the world tell men and women (particularly ones that I know are beautiful in so many ways) that they are nothing. I am tired of watching my friends hurt because they choose to listen to these lies.

So what happens to these beautiful women and men who let themselves believe such lies? They tie themselves to jobs and people who just keep dragging them through the same mud. They think they have come so far, so they stop where they are. They don't see that so much more is out there for them. They take abuses that are physical, emotional, and even spiritual without so much as a sigh of complaint. They see what it is like to hurt like this, so they try to hide it from those who love them best. They will fight for someone else in their same situation, but they will not fight for themselves.

So we live in a world that lets beautiful women think they are ugly, worthless or hated simply because we have forgotten how to just love and appreciate each other. At least I know that I do my best to love and appreciate those around me even while they are stabbing me (figuratively and not so figuratively) in the heart. That is a story for another time, however.

Once more I find myself without much to say. I should be saying less. My nanowrimo is barely breathing this year, though my critics seem to think it is interesting. Of course, I only gave them the taste of the first two paragraphs. It could go downhill from there. We'll see...

My muse has decided to pour it on rather thick today. If she were icing a cake, the icing would be at least times the thickness of the cake. That would be one fabulously rich cake. I've written a couple of poems, a few song starters (they need work--so much work), and even made a dent in my word debt for my nanowrimo. The best part of all of this is that the day is not over yet.

When angels close their eyes
They can still hear the lies
That are washing truth away
And making us forget to pray

When angels close their eyes
They see through the disguise
Of those who have let go
Of the truth they used to know

When angels close their eyes
And someone's soul slowly dies
The eyes when opened fill with tears
To see another succumb to fears

When angels close their eyes
The one who too oft relies
May fall again with gilded wings
But so few believe these things

If I needed a friend today
Would you call or send me on my way
Assuming someone else would pull me in
Break me away from the state I am in

If I needed a friend today
Would you care or walk away
Waiting until I am not broken
Or at least such things aren't spoken

If I needed a fried today
Would you have anything to say
Or just turn to me a deaf ear
Drawing away when I need you here

Here I stand where the ocean meets the sea
And heaven and hell both wash over me
Until I am buffeted by these storms
I can not break free, accept the forms
Of faith and pain that set me free
Bring me closer, hold all eternity
At bay while I bow my head and pray
That I will find the right words to say
When my love has been sorely abused
And I no longer wish to be used
So I stand here on the brink of destruction
Waiting for them to forget my affection

Silent streets made barren by snow
No one travels, no one can know
If ice lies underneath the white
Waiting to bring one to eternal night
Such fears bind us hear inside
Where we think we can hide
But soon the snow melts, truth reveals
All that we thought a lie conceals
And the world is more icy in the sun
Than it was when lies had not begun

I went out into the snowy night last night. It wasn't too snowy, but I have made this mistake before and was not surprised to find I had made it again. I went to Monday Mormon Moments where I learned that I had a single father and only one sister, so we are probably getting adopted into another family. I hope my new family loves me, too. Anyway, not too much excitement happened there. No one mistook an olive for a grape, so the eating wasn't as fun as it was on Friday.

From there, I dropped by a friend's house to eat a cookie and spend time with the most lovable dog in the world. Rumors were circulating that Princess has a boyfriend whom she loves more than anyone, but she has picked me over him most of the time, so I think the rumors are unfounded. She enjoyed her exit into the snow much more than I did.

I was only at her house for about an hour, but my car had turned white by the time I went outside. As I am no longer driving the Omni, this is not an acceptable color for my car. The streets were also a nice, fluffy white, which you can imagine let to all sorts of pitter-pattering in my chest cavity. Being determined and stubborn, I decided to drive home anyway. I did not make it all the way home. I parked outside some friends' house, dropped off a repaired item of clothing, and trotted through the snow (in my incredibly sensible purple boots) until I reached my home. I rewarded myself with some hot chocolate and some sleep.

This morning, I had to trot back through the snow and clean off my car again. I can only hope my friends and their neighbors managed to sleep through my conversation with my car and the snow. Later in the day, I had a conversation with a friend from high school. It's always nice to be reminded that some people really are good from start to finish. This doesn't mean I give up on the ones who struggle. It just means I have more desire to see them pull through and become the person they can become when they let go of the past.

The episode of Touched by an Angel that I watched today included a story that I will paraphrase here:

A man once lived who was afraid of lions. His fear was so great that he was always looking over his shoulder. He was certain that someday, he would look back and find that the lion was right behind him. The irony of this story is that he spent so much time looking back that he eventually walked right into the open maw of the lion.

Sometimes we do that to ourselves. We spend so much time worrying about our past mistakes that we just fall back into bad habits. I wish there was a way to help my friends understand that they can move beyond what they used to be. I have. I guess I'll just have to keep praying...

I want to thank the turkeys of the world for all of the things that they do for us. I want to thank them for being delicious. I want to thank them for encouraging us to "gobble gobble". I want to thank them for giving me yet another cool name to call people who are silly.

So this is the day where we feel compelled to tell what we are thankful for. I am thankful for having the chance to spend time with some dear friends. I am grateful for living in a country where I can eat way too much and not feel too terribly bad about it. Of course, I may not be able to eat again for a week, unless a pecan pie is calling out my name which has been known to happen from time to time. Anyway, here is a song that I have decided I like very much. Read it carefully:

Ordinary Miracle ~Sarah McLachlan

It's not that unusual
When everything is beautiful.
It's just another ordinary miracle today.

The sky knows when its time to snow,
Don't need to teach a seed to grow.
It's just another ordinary miracle today.

Life is like a gift they say
Wrapped up for you everyday;
Open up and find a way
To give some of your own.

Isn't it remarkable?
Like every time a rain drop falls,
It's just another ordinary miracle today.

Birds in winter have their fling
But always make it home by spring.
It's just another ordinary miracle today.

When you wake up everyday
Please don't throw your dreams away;
Hold them close to your heart
Cause we're all a part
Of the ordinary miracle.
Ordinary miracle

Do you want to see a miracle?
ohh ohh ohh, ohhh ohh ohh...

It seems so exceptional
That things just work out after all.
It's just another ordinary miracle today.

Sun comes up and shines so bright
And disappears again at night.
It's just another ordinary miracle today.
ohh ohh ohh, ohh ohhh ohh...
It's just another ordinary miracle today.

Sometimes dreaming is very unsatisfying. You dream you accomplished everything you want to. Then you wake up and realize that those things are still undone. If we had the confidence of dreamland when we are awake, imagine the things you could accomplish.

In my wakeful moments today, I have made accomplishments. The most notable of these was the creation of hundreds of delicious candy confections. The holiday season is best begun with holiday candy making. I even added pecan turtles to my repetoire today. This will result in people seeing more of me before the year is over. Now if I can accomplish some of the things that have resulted in my most relaxing dreams...

I have a couple of friends who frequently seem to disappear from my life. This may be because I usually only see them at church. When work or pain keeps them from making it to church, we do not see each other. A couple of these friends actually showed up for church today but disappeared quickly. I don't think they could imagine how happy I was to see them in one of my favorite places even if it was only for a brief time.

As it is Sunday, I received much good advice to tell people how much I adore The Book of Mormon and be timely and reverent at church. As I tend to be early for church, I have that one covered. I am certain I can work on being more reverent. I was obsessing over my poorness and my huge X-mas list today and last week I worked on my nanowrimo novel. Sadly, I barely cracked 20,000 words which is less than half. I could make excuses for why I had such a miserable showing of words, but that would take too long and use too many words.

I am hoping the next month holds some resolution, relaxation, and revelation for me. The only way I will know for sure though is to step into it. Let's get ready for holidays...