I take too long between writings, don't I? I keep resolving to be better and then I let myself be distracted. Too much to do. Too much to write. Too much to say. But is anyone listening?

A friend let me spend time with her little ones today. Another friend stopped by to drop things off and asked if I was babysitting. I laughed and informed him that I was just having a play date with people my own age. Three and almost three is really close to seven hundred and fourteen when you're clinging to your youth.

We have to hold onto our youth after all. Kids today have the greatest toys. If we grow up too fast, people will look at us funny when we want to play with minions and monstaz. I know you know what I mean, but will you admit it?

As usual, the thoughts racing through my mind have sent me careening through a million projects. A couple of them got finished. Others wait upon my nimble, slightly battered fingers. Perhaps you would like to score something from the completed pile? Perhaps not, but I do appreciate the show of moral support.

In other news, you really can win if you answer those surveys at the bottom of your receipt. After answering about a hundred of them, I finally won a small prize to help me pick up a few more items. I have to wonder if the positive review I gave swayed the odds in my favor.

My return from a week long vacation has heralded my typically overflowing list of tasks to accomplish. To add to my excitement, my oven decided to retire one of its heating coils this weekend. Luckily, I had already made a much-desired giant cookie for myself and one for my husband. He already took steps to assure the return of baked delight in our kitchen.

Just wanted to assure my glorious fans that I live, I breathe, I hope, and I plan to write and organize and generally bring more light into the world.

After a week on the high seas, being the worst pirate ever (since I don't drink rum, pillage, or apparently have the sturdiest sea stomach), I have been running around my house in endless circles. It seems I now want everything shipshape. In actuality, I think I just feel like a sloth after a full week of no projects, tons of sun, and food available at all hours. Instead of partaking of all the complimentary provender, I just watched with wide eyes as some of the people in my group ate their weight in cookies, pie, and entrees, oh my, every day. I fear they may end up buying their cardiologists new boats sooner than expected.

Among the most interesting moments of the trip:

Seasickness overtook me on our first full day at sea. I took a much-needed nap and neglected to eat the chocolate provided by the cruise ship. That's probably for the best since it looked suspiciously like the cheap waxy chocolate you get from the dollar store.

The entertainment director taught a seminar on the "Thriller" dance, but he moved far too gracefully to be a zombie. It was disconcerting in ways I can't even describe.

I have never had as many women call me sexy in such a short period of time as the vendors crammed into the Nassau straw market.

Rude people on the high seas should be thrown overboard, especially if they are being paid to be polite and civil to people who aren't being rude to them. Keep that in mind if you ever work on a cruise ship.

Our two waiters have earned their wings. They politely and happily attended to the needs of a dozen people, some of whom ordered multiple starters and entrees every night. (see above commentary about cardiologists)

Trying to shower in a bathroom the size of a small closet can be super fun when the ship is rolling in the deep.

I have some amazing costume ideas thanks to the on-board entertainment. I shall have to store it away since I still have some craft projects waiting for me from before I left.

When we returned from visits to the random ports, they sprayed us down with antibacterial spray. I have to appreciate their desire to keep us healthy, but one of the guys did it in such a way that you'd think I was covered from head to toe in mud and used hypodermic needles. Luckily, the woman we saw most often outside the dining hall was much more pleasant as she offered us more antibacterial love.

Since returning home, I feel I have washed a billion loads of laundry. I also feel I have moved the same twenty items fifty times. It's so hard to find a good place to put souvenirs before you get a chance to deliver them. I also made time to join another cat lady at an eating establishment geared toward dog lovers. We managed to make it out without them catching onto us. Aren't you relieved?